Nightcrawlers

Rory J. Koopmans, B. Admin., Grant MacEwan University Harvey's Courtesy Wifi, Edmonton, Alberta

June VIIth, MMXVI

Hon. Dave Eggen, B. Ed., MLA, Minister of Education, New Democratic, Edmonton-Calder

Dear Dave:

Having just attended Question Period yesterday afternoon, then night session until just past midnight last night, & today's AM closing session of the Alberta Legislature so I could say I worked all three shifts with the MLAs, you get to notice a few things about the night shift that political science students might find interesting. Also, they are things you don't see on day shift.

I. Jason Nixon, MLA, Wildrose, Rimbey-Rocky Mountain House-Sundre temporarily resigned from his caucus to sit on the Government benches & serves as Minister of Finance & President of the Treasury Board in place of the Hon. Joe Ceci, B. S. W., M. S. W., MLA, New Democratic, Calgary-Fort.

II. Contrary to popular belief, Heather Sweet, MLA, New Democratic, Edmonton-Manning when acting as Chair of the Committee of the Whole & pouring her coffee uses sugar & not "sweet"ener as per the political rumour mill.

III. The Hon. Sarah Hoffman, B. A., B. Ed., M. A., M. Ed., MLA, Deputy Premier & Minister of Health, New Democratic, Edmonton-Glenora saves taxpayers considerable expense by shopping at Dollarama for evening snacks & Fishermens Friend cough tablets for yourself as even your throat is so dry & parched because even you can barely "swallow" the New Democratic Government carbon tax policy (sales tax in disguise, albeit open disguise.)

IV. David Swann, MD, B. MSc., FRSC, MLA, Liberal, Calgary-Mountain View resigned as Alberta Liberal Leader temporarily so that Jessica Littlewood, New Democratic, Fort Saskatchewan-Vegreville could garner some leadership experience.

V. The MLAs that add the word "Member" in front of their title for gender neutrality don't have any idea whether they are voting as men or women or were voting for gender reassignment surgery. That's okay, their motions were tabled & their amendments were defeated.

VI. Sandra Jansen, MLA, M. Comm., Progressive Conservative, Calgary-Northwest doesn't have a big enough purse. She needs one at least twice the size so she can put more outfits in it for her Summer Legislature Fashion Show on the south lawn.

VII. The Hon. Stephanie McLean, B. A., LL. B., MLA, Minister of Service Alberta & The Status of Women, New Democratic, Calgary-Varsity was ruled "out of order" by the Hon. Bobby Wanner, B. A., M. A., M. B. A., MLA, Speaker, New Democratic, Medicine Hat for not bring her baby Master Patrick McLean into the Chamber for amendment votes. As Speaker Wanner pointed out in the "Alberta Hansard", the baby squawks less than most of the MLAs & is certainly filled with less crap.

VIII. The Edmonton Journal Alberta Legislature Bureau Columnist Graham Thomson never actually sits in the Legislature Press Gallery box. Like many MLAs, he's just "phoning" it in. thanks for telling me Paula Simons his Journal compatriot & Don Braid of The Calgary Herald.

IX. "Retro" Laurie Callsen (ex girlfriend of Captain America) brings her feline son Archie into planning session for the Premier's Communications Office daily. This is why the nasty turn lately in the New Democratic Government's attitude to the Opposition. Archie (in between malts's with Jughead & Reggie at Pop's Malt Shop) has singlehandedly turned this attitude into a gender neutered "Catitude."

IX. No Ukranian restaurant would deliver a bulk order of perogies for the Assembly supper hour. They were scared the Wildrose wouldn't pay for the perogies & then throw them in the "lake of fire."

Nightlight,

Rory

Source: Myself & Www.Assembly.Ab.ca & "X-Men: Apocalypyse (TM)", Marvel Comics Enterprises (TM), Marvel Studios (TM) & XXth Century Fox Studios (TM.)